Diamonds Don't Heal All Wounds. But it Helps?!

Saweetie Photo: Blair Cladwell/Warner Records

Your mental health is way more important than any relationship and this holds true from the recent statements from the Music Artist, Saweetie who recently confirmed her breakup with rapper Quavo. I find it funny how some people are blaming some celebrity breakups or breakups in general on people being quarantined. I believe this pandemic has given us the necessary time to reflect on the unhealthy relationships we may be a part of, the time and agency to do something about it. If more time with your partner makes you break up then there may be other underlying issue(s) you that you both didn’t address in the past; don’t get me wrong “me-time” is important but more quality time shouldn’t bring more division in a relationship.

Unfortunately, for many people they are in relationships where gift-giving isn’t the primary love language in the relationship, so a gift in-the-middle of a crisis in a relationship may feel like a great pacifier or bandaid for a bad situation. Thus, exposing a sad reality that giving a gift no matter how great or small can sway the cheated-on party to forgive their partner or ignore their harmful behaviors in a relationship. People tend to hate on the trend in popular culture or music that promotes women getting gifts, money, or status from a partner -- enter hypergamy and the City Girls soundtrack. This culture normalizes the art of gift giving from men, making it customary or mandatory for suitors to provide a better lifestyle that women or party is accustomed to.

All in all, some might find some of their notions problematic but normalizing the receiving of gifts may help raise the standard and lower the tolerance for cheating etc. In the sense, when you normalize the incentives (jewelry, money, shoes etc.) you will not be inclined to stay because of another purse. That’s why I always encourage dating and pampering yourself, the way you’d want a partner to treat you so it's normal for you to accept nothing-less but the best. This is not a fool proof plan but it's a start to avoid being gaslighted to stay in a mental unhealthy situation. You were that chick before them, and you’d be just fine after the situation. In the end, it takes more communication and actual work to repair a relationship and it takes two willing consenting parties that fully understand the gravity of infidelity and why it happened in the relationship. Love can’t be bartered, only by nurturing it continuously can it grow and build a solid foundation through transparent communication, acts of service, quality time, and affectional and physical gifts. You invest in what’s important, so your partner should invest in all of you and that includes protecting your mental health and the relationship.